elsajeni | Whee! RenFest!

Okay. I've had about 8 hours of sleep total the last 2 nights. I got up at 7 this morning to go to RenFest. I feel like shit.

BUT I HAVE A SWORD, DAMMIT.

So, here's a lovely RenFest story for you, taking place about an hour before I bought my sword, while we were still running around looking at pointy things and the like. The group of five I was part of had crowded into a teeeeeeeeeensy little pointy-things shop, and it was incredibly stuffy in there, and I was already exhausted and dehydrated and decided that, if I did not want to pass out, I should go outside and sit down and wait for them. So I did.

Enter Skeevy Drunk Man. Who is old enough to be my father. And who comes up to me and opens the conversation with, "Hey. Are you alone?"

"No, I'm here with someone. We came with a group."

"Oh. I'm Ed. What's your name?"

"Liz."

"Where're you from?"

"Houston."

"What part?"

"Southwest."

"Oh yeah? I was there once. The refineries, you can't, uh, you can't breathe. I'm a refinery. Pipe-fitter. What's your name again?"

"Liz."

"Oh yeah, yeah. That's my aunt's name. My aunt, lives in Corpus, uh... uh... y'know, Corpus."

At this point, finally, the guys I was with are done looking at shiny pointy objects and have started heading over toward where I'm sitting. I give them the "Help, There's A Skeevy Man Hitting On Me" eyeball, and they pick up the pace. Considerably.

"Hey, Liz," they all say. Zack lays a semi-territorial hand on my shoulder.

Let me take a moment here to describe the scene for you. What Skeevy Drunk Man has seen so far is an unaccompanied, non-threatening skinny blonde chick sitting on a bench. Now, suddenly, he sees:
1. Brenton, the least threatening member of the group, scrawny and unarmed, who has faded into the background behind the other three.
2. Zack, who has a large bullwhip on his belt and is looking Quite Pissed Off at Skeevy Drunk Man hitting on his girlfriend.
3. Bob, who is large and is holding a mace. A very pointy mace. A very pointedly pointy mace. And he really looks like he'd love a chance to test it.
4. Ray, an absolutely fucking huge Hispanic guy who has a broadsword across his back, a dagger in his belt, and a little boot-knife he's just bought in one hand, and who is also looking like he'd love the chance to give his newfound personal armory a test run.

Skeevy Drunk man looks concerned. "Oh. Hey, when you said you were here with someone I thought you meant girls. Good to meet you." And he makes what I'm sure he'd like to consider a dignified retreat, except that he sort of scuttled off while looking over one shoulder, and also tripped over a tree root.

None of us could stop laughing for some thirty minutes.

So yeah, I just got back. Still all dehydrated and feeling like shit. Am currently near the beginning of my second Nalgene bottle full of water (about, oh, 36 ounces in a bottle). BUT I HAVE A SWORD.

I scared my roommate.